Time; a concept we understand fully, yet at the same time, we lose sight of it, and in the same turn it is our enemy. And I don’t think we realize until we get older what time really means. Most of us ignore the factor of time outside of our daily lives. Time is a clock, where we set appointments, arrive at work, leave work, set schedules, wedding dates, blah, blah, blah. But to sit down and contemplate the true meaning of time, it scares the hell out of most of us, so we choose not to engage in the thought. I do the opposite. I think about time and how little I have. But, I dare mention, I wish it away at the same time, knowing that I am wishing away time that I cannot retrieve.
We sure waste a lot of time doing a bunch of stuff that makes no difference. Cleaning, playing online games. Even my quest for further education is a big waste of time, but then, what isnt a waste of time? What should we be spending our time on? What in the world makes a difference? The lines are blurred for me. I know time is precious and yet I dont know what I should be spending it on. I know I should be spending it with my family, but what does that accomplish exactly?
How do I make a difference? I feel like I am annoying to most people so I dont feel I have the knowledge base to really affect other peoples lives. I think I know a lot, but in the grand scheme of things, world wide, I know very little.
I see the world as a place crowded with people, trying to survive, trying to find love, trying to find answers to all the little questions that come up. Trying to raise a family and make ends meet, trying to keep up with the Jones’; but, what do people really know? and what should we do with what we know? Most people are right in their own eyes, so they arent going to believe you anyway, ifyou tell them something profound, especially if you have no degree to back it up, and even if you do, they still dont believe you. What are we here for exactly? Are we running a race? And if we are, what are we racing to? the guy who acquires the biggest wallet? the most property? The most fans? Of how about the people who race to eat more? (as you look around and see all the fat people in the world, its quite astonishing.)
Nothing makes sense. Nothing.
Nothing lasts in the world, and nothing stays the same. What can we possibly do for ourselves and each other that can make a difference and what would it a make a difference to?
What is honor?
What is courage?
What is hope?
And what are we honoring?
what are we couragous for?
and what do we hope for? A new car, a better job?
We work, we converse, we play, and none of it means anything.
And dont ask me why I am even thinking this way, the words just started flowing. I for once am writing what I am thinking. Crazy, huh? Yeah, I dont understand myself either. lol!
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Liderien 
I get what you are saying, I think. You are perhaps wondering if anything you or the-human-race aspire too has any actual infallable meaning? If that is the case then I have asked the same question.
My answer to that question has been that I must restore the love and compassion in the world. Yes, it truly sucks, but in knowing that we fail and fall and break. That is what makes us so worth while to each other.
we derive our meaning out of the misery!
I admire your ability to toughen up and face the facts regardless of what they might do to you. Rare quality indeed. Are you perhaps a distiller of gold? 🙂
Just found this and thought it might be relevant to the above.
Your life is what your thoughts make it.
Marcus Aurelius
I love it. Simple and true!
I love Marcus Aurelius. A Philospher of sorts. Thank you for your comments. To write what I think about is breathtaking for it doesnt happen that often. I think so really good stuff and when i go to write it down it comes out completely different and wihtout the magic it had when I first thought it.
I know the feeling. I was reflecting on my [poor] writing the other day and concluded that I have great ideas… and not the ability to translate them to my reader. For some dumb reason I also choose to write in english [as opposed to Afrikaans]and naturally make silly errors.
But my darting mind leaves the reader behind, I think.
Got up this morning and felt like doing a song [not that I sing, that form of expression sucks too!] and it came out brilliantly… and tried writing the words in Afrikaans. Song came out great… but ofcourse the singing wasn’t great. But I was impressed with my Afrikaans writing actually. It came out very mysterious. So for me… I should probably just stick to my own universe.
But in your case I think you pioneer things. That makes it more difficult because there aren’t many truth-seeker role models and peers out there. In that regard we stand alone, and stubbornly choose to do so. And so our concepts even more lonely [as with your tree]. and so our vocabulary on those tricky subjects also suffer. Perhaps try out a really simple topic. Human emotions are tricky[I think you’re good though, and would have made a good psychologist. Insight you have.]
But I’ll keep an eye out. Will pop in every now and then. You’re welcome to also hop around on my website. its a part time thing, and I live in an area where I don’t have actual internet. So everything there is a rush job. Its a slow work in progress.
Old Marc was all right. Must have been great to live in those times. Most people back then had time to think and we try and get them but I sometimes feel as if we just are emotionally not rich enough to enjoy them. But great Gems all those thinkers. Wish I had the time to sit and “live” there among the stoics and so forth.
The wisest man, according to God’s testimony, Solomon, spent twelve chapters wrestling with the very same issues (Ecclesiastes)… what’s life all about? He concludes: Fear God and keep His commandments, for this is the whole duty of man…
Yes, the lines get more and more blurred as we near the end of the age, but God wants the best for us, including rich, full lives. Of all the trees in the garden, they could eat freely from all but ONE… what liberty we have in Christ!
Love God and never be ashamed of Jesus Christ… peel away the trappings of religion and seeking the approval of man… what freedom, what liberty, what joy!